No one believed Aubameyang would go to Manchester United

Manchester United have supposedly ran into a snag in their pursuit to pry Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang from Arsenal. Yeah, the snag of ridiculousness.

A couple of days ago, I wrote about the new rumor that Manchester United was eyeing up a move for Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang. Of course, from an Arsenal perspective, this was the worst possible rumor ever. In that piece, I wrote about how it would be exactly that—the worst thing ever.

But at no point has this rumor even breached upon reality. There is nothing about this rumor that was ever going to happen, other than it’s futile existence among the other slew of rumors that are bound to be cooked up during this lull.

Maybe there was a question asked from United to Arsenal, but even United had to know that they had no shot of ever getting their hands on Aubameyang.

There are several reasons why, but for starters, the Gunners are past that phase. Everyone knows it. We’re in a new era with new people in charge and they aren’t going to strengthen our rivals in a time like this.

More than that though, who’s in charge? Mikel Arteta. The guy who lived through the Dark Ages of selling all our stars to rivals that he then had to play against. If anyone was going to prevent such times from happening again, it would be Arteta. The captain from that era.

Rest assured, my fellow Gooners, Aubameyang will not be scoring goals against us next year. If we do make it into the Champions League, Aubameyang will stay. If we don’t, he will go to a La Liga team that is in the Champions League where we will not be. That pain of seeing our favorite superstars score against us will be lost for good.

And in the meantime, we will be growing our own superstars back home.

Don’t count out getting back into the Champions League though. Which is another reason this link to United is funny—they aren’t back in the Champions league yet either. So we’ve got two teams not yet in the Champions League competing for a guy who strictly wants Champions League? Get out of town.

Again, let me say that Aubameyang will never play for Manchester United. This rumor didn’t need to “hit a snag.” Its feasibility was its own snag. Even if we don’t have him anymore, we’ll be well clear of the danger.